As a kid, he dreamt of being a ballplayer. He was so sure that he was going to be the next Willie Mays or Barry Bonds that he never bothered much with school or other activities. He didn’t have time for friends, figuring they would just weigh him down once he hit the big time. His dreams were in black and orange; he could smell the grass, hear the crack of the bat, and even taste the champagne being poured all over him in the locker room. Yes, his future was at Candlestick Park. Definitely.
And it was. Only not the way he planned it. A fastball, a curve ball, a sinker, he couldn’t hit for shit; he still made it to the big leagues, and for San Francisco no less. He was the Crazy Crab, the San Francisco Giants mascot. The Giants marketing execs thought it would be a great idea to have a wacky character that represents San Francisco; why not a crab?
From the very start he was loved; fans loved to hate him, to boo and hiss him. He was sure that it was because no one thought crabs were particularly cuddly, positive it had nothing to do with his performance. He had the moves down! His dance to “Baby Elephant Walk” was brilliant, the choreography sublime.
People just threw hot dogs at him because they didn’t like seafood. Assholes.
Update: In 1997, Lou Seal was introduced as the San Francisco Giants mascot after a thirteen year drought, replacing long forgotten, despised Crazy Crab. Wayne Doba, the actor who portrayed Crazy Crab, reportedly told a Giants executive, "I hope there's nobody up there with a gun."
No comments:
Post a Comment