Gentle Enough for Daily Peruse

Get the hint! Leave the creatures of the sea alone; stop inviting yourself into their homes or face the consequences:

http://sports.espn.go.com/outdoors/general/news/story?id=2666064

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/15964896/

Rogue sea lion? No, rogue humans invading the sea lion's space. Did you swimmers get an invitation? No, the bay is a private party; get your brisk morning swim in a swimming pool, party crashers.

As for "Kasatka", she is no goddamned Shamu, who'll take a dive for a song. "Kasatka" swims and "performs" on her own terms, and by the way, her REAL her name is Betty.

O! Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

I trudged up to Starbuck's before I headed to work. Christ, I feel like such an asshole when I go to get "coffee"; I'm like a character in "LA Story":

"I'll have a grande, decaf, nonfat, peppermint white mocha with whipped." I already look like a tool placing the order, but whatever happened to small, medium, large? Starbucks is from Seattle, not Siena.

I wait in the line of shame for my barista, Mike, to make my drink.

"Have a great day.", Mike barks out, as he puts down my grande, decaf, nonfat, peppermint white mocha with whipped. He doesn't mean it, he doesn't even look at me. Nice.

I leave Starbucks and cross the street, past the grand entrance to Chinatown; a huge, ornate archway on Grant Avenue where many pose for pictures before moving on to shop for gifts.

"Good morning!", a pleasant looking Asian woman calls to me. She is smiling at me. She means it.

"Good morning!", I call back.

"Spare a quarter!?", the woman sniffs at me.

Ugh! No!

"Sorry", I say as I pass by her. No, I'm not sorry.

The old woman snorts and hawks a loogey right behind me. Yum.

I continue on, past the "Antique" store. Fine antiquities fresh from the factory for San Francisco tourists.

Finally I get to work, say a quick hello to everyone at the front desk, and drop my stuff in my office. Just as I'm about to sit down at my desk, I notice a bum taking a piss in the alley behind my office. What a perfect start to the day; it can only get better.

From the desk of...

Hi!

Several years ago I received a newsletter called "Knead to Know". Do you send out brochures about bread, baking, etc.? I would love to have them. I only use Fleischmann's yeast.

Thanking you in advance,

Regards,
Betty T. Bartlett

Gentle Enough for Daily Peruse

Glamour Girl

...or so proclaimed a Macy's ad of Paris Hilton in the paper today. Well, hmmm, let's see....

-Ms. Hilton can currently be seen in straight-to-dvd "Bottom's Up".

-was seen cackling when her bilionaire friend Brandon Davis caled Lindsay Lohan "fire crotch".

-soaped up herself and a car while eating a cheeseburger in a Carl's Junior ad.

-and let's not forget her sexcapades in "One Night in Paris" (ok that was not her choice, but letting the camera roll with Rick Solomon?)

American Heritage Dictionary:

glam·our also glam·or (glmr) Pronunciation Key n.
An air of compelling charm, romance, and excitement, especially when delusively alluring.
Archaic. A magic spell; enchantment.

You make the call.

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